The Misadventures of Me

By Jan Angelo. Exeter, South Australia, Australia

Click the below arrow to hear Jan read her story.

Well, here I am — 60 years young and not pretending to have it all figured out. Sure, I’ve got a few more wrinkles — thank God for hair dye! I also have lifetime of ridiculous stories that make me wonder how I’m still standing. If I had a dollar for every wild decision and crazy adventure I’ve had, I’d be sipping cocktails in a hammock somewhere. Oh wait — that’s next …

Let’s talk about my childhood. For some reason I ended up feeling responsible for everything and everyone at home. Moving in with the nuns when things were tough for my single mum wasn’t exactly on my wish list. Instead, the universe threw me a curveball and gave me two options: move to Venezuela and live with my aunt — that’s right, at 12, I was nearly off to South America — or go away to boarding school, which I guess you could say was my first taste of freedom. I never did master the school uniform (seriously, who can?) but I did have some wild adventures and made lifelong friends along the way.

At 18, I went full wild-child mode, living in the great outdoors, getting bruised and battered in the Welsh countryside at The Adventure Centre. Super fun, super reckless. My body wasn’t as resilient as I thought, but hey, I came out stronger, and ready (physically, anyway) for the army. At 19, I showed up, looking confident, but feeling terrified. (I had a great poker face!) Boarding school had provided me the discipline I needed to survive initial training, but it went downhill from there. I was a well-rounded and resilient individual — not your typical squaddie material, which did me no favours. After a turbulent thirty-two days of not fitting in, I was offered ‘Sandhurst’ Office Training School — a privilege for some, but the army wasn’t for me!

In my twenties, I was cooking up a storm in a commercial kitchen. Overnight, I found myself acting G.M., managing corporate events. It was the eighties — a man’s world. And there I was, the only female in the boardroom, surrounded by public schoolboy managers in Knightsbridge London, sharing words of wisdom. A few walk-in fridge mishaps later, I had made it. (Sort of.)

A relationship split was the catalyst to a huge lifestyle change. Leaving city life behind, I found peace in the countryside. It was like hitting “rewind” on my childhood — slowing down, remembering how to laugh, and rediscovering joy. Who knew that stepping away from my high-powered job would be the key to finding me again?

Each adventure has taught me something important: Life is messy. And sometimes, it’s downright hilarious.

But the real curveball? Losing everything again! In one single month. Career, house, boyfriend — gone. Like someone hit the “reset” button on my life. Instead of crumbling, though, I embraced the blank canvas and hit the pause button on life. Seriously, I took a break to just breathe. It was like the universe hit “timeout” for me, and I was definitely overdue for one.

While I was hitting the reset button, I had a heart-to-heart with my Nan. She said, “Prioritize your health and everything else will follow.” Venezuela calling … visiting my cousin in the Amazon jungle. If you’ve never been surrounded by trees that look like they could eat you, you’re missing out. (Or not.) I’m still not sure which is
worse: the trees or the mosquito bites.

But let’s not forget Egypt. I spent a day navigating a shark-infested sea with only a prayer and a bodyguard who looked like he walked out of an action movie. No biggie. Mission almost impossible? That was, until I ended up horseback riding in the Sahara Desert with gastro. Yes, that happened. You can’t make this stuff up. Let’s just say, muscle control reached new levels of skill. These few stories are just the tip of the iceberg — there are more!

It was time for another adventure! At 39, after my lovely Nan passed, I took a leap of faith and went to work in Turkey Hiking ancient ruins, sailing through crystal-clear waters — pure magic.

On reflection, each adventure has taught me something important: Life is messy. And sometimes, it’s downright hilarious.

Then, at 43, I took a huge gamble. I left my family and friends behind and moved to Australia for love. A thousand dollars, twenty-three kilos of luggage, and zero plans. That’s right, zero. It was messy, it was tough, and it wasn’t always a fairytale. Along the way, I also dealt with someone’s addiction. It was one of those life lessons that wasn’t mine, but it helped shaped me. I learned how to draw boundaries and keep my sanity. (It’s still a work in progress, to be honest.)

At 60 years old, and I’ve come to a major realization: I don’t need to have it all figured out! Life doesn’t come with a roadmap. Nowadays, I’m too busy laughing at myself, rolling with the punches, and taking risks that make life worth living. I’ve made mistakes. I’ve made bad decisions. But I’ve also had some wild, incredible moments. And I’d rather keep playing than sit on the sidelines wondering “what if.” So, here’s to whatever’s next (whatever that looks like). And if you’re up for the next wild adventure or want to hear more, then grab a seat — I’m not slowing down anytime soon!